Can’t Afford to Keep Up With Your Friends?

Hey Simplifiers,

There’s always that moment. Your group chat lights up with a dinner invite—at a place that charges $19 for fries. Or someone drops, “We should do Cabo this summer!” and you’re still budgeting for groceries. If you’ve ever felt like the “broke friend,” you’re not alone.

As we move through adulthood, the income gap within friend groups often widens. Promotions, career pivots, and even inherited wealth can create big differences—and with them, big emotions.

Why Does It Feel So Awkward?

Psychologists say the discomfort often stems from shame and comparison.

• You want to join in, but can’t afford to.

• You feel like you’re missing out—or holding others back.

• You start thinking your value in the group is tied to how much you earn.

Let’s be clear: Your paycheck does not define your worth or your place in your friendships.

What to Do If You’re the Lowest Earner in the Group

Here are some ways to take care of yourself (without ghosting the group chat):

✅ Set boundaries without shame:
It’s okay to say, “That’s out of my budget, but I’d love to catch up another way.”

✅ Offer alternatives:
Suggest free or lower-cost hangouts: potlucks, walks, game nights, or happy hour instead of full dinners.

✅ Don’t suffer in silence:
You don’t have to disclose your exact finances, but honesty helps. You’d be surprised how often others feel the same but are too embarrassed to speak up.

✅ Stop measuring your worth in dollars:
Friendship isn’t transactional. Your sense of humor, support, and vibe are priceless.

✅ Make peace with saying no:
Missing one trip doesn’t mean missing the friendship.

Feeling embarrassed is valid, but it is also rooted in a culture that equates money with status. Don’t let it silence you or push you away from people who care. The right friends won’t care if your dinner budget is $15. They’ll just want you at the table.

Need help building a life that fits your income, not someone else’s? Check out our Just-in-Time Toolkit or grab our Financial Freedom Guide to align your finances with your reality, not the group chat's.

You belong—even if you make less.

With grace & growth,
C 🩶
Founder, The Simple Adult